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Sarcastic Love Quotes
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“Sometimes I need what only you can provide: your absence.”
Ashleigh Brilliant
“It's always darkest before it turns absolutely pitch black.”
Paul Newman
“It's a catastrophic success.”
Stephen Bishop
“I feel so miserable without you, it's almost like having you here.”
Stephen Bishop
“History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all other alternatives.”
Abba Eban
“No, Groucho is not my real name. I am breaking it in for a friend.”
Groucho Marx
“How do you feel about women's rights? I like either side of them.”
Groucho Marx
“A man is as young as the woman he feels.”
Groucho Marx
“A child of five could understand this. Fetch me a child of five.”
Groucho Marx
“Marry me and I'll never look at another horse!”
Groucho Marx
“If you find it hard to laugh at yourself, I would be happy to do it for you.”
Groucho Marx
“Marriage is the chief cause of divorce.”
Groucho Marx
“I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.”
Groucho Marx
“I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.”
Groucho Marx
“I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it.”
Groucho Marx
“I didn't like the play, but then I saw it under adverse conditions - the curtain was up.”
Groucho Marx
“The United States is a nation of laws: badly written and randomly enforced.”
Frank Zappa
“The 100% American is 99% idiot.”
George Bernard Shaw
“The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech.”
George Bernard Shaw
“He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.”
Oscar Wilde
“Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.”
Oscar Wilde
“I am not young enough to know everything.”
Oscar Wilde
“Between men and women there is no friendship possible. There is passion, enmity, worship, love, but no friendship.”
Oscar Wilde
“He was happily married - but his wife wasn't.”
Victor Borge
“I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.”
Mark Twain
“Stay with me; I want to be alone”
Joey Adams
“He is a self-made man and worships his creator.”
Irvin S. Cobb
“When people are free to do as they please, they usually imitate each other.”
Eric Hoffer
“If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.”
“You are not as bad as people say, you are much, much worse.”
“A conscience is what hurts when all of your other parts feel so good. ”
“Middle age is when broadness of the mind and narrowness of the waist change places. ”
“The trouble with a kitten is that it eventually becomes a cat.”
Ogden Nash
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