Crazy Stupid Love (Movie Quotes)
Emily: (to Cal) "When I told you when I had to work late? I really went to go see the new twilight movie by myself, and it was so bad."
Emily and Cal have a big, big problem: She cheated on him. But even more disturbing: She saw the latest 'Twilight' movie without him. Sure sign of marital discord, right?
Cal: "Who told you that Emily and I are getting divorced?"
Cal's Boss: "Amy heard you crying in the bathroom - we all thought it was cancer."
Cal's Boss: "Thank God, man..." (laughing)
Cal: (laughs) "Yeah, just my relationship..."
Sad state of affairs (so to speak) when people are relieved it's just a divorce...
Emily: "I'm trying to think about what I want..." (looks at restaurant menu)
Cal: "Why don't we just say it at the same time? One, two three..."
Emily: "I want a divorce."
Cal: (simultaneously) "Creme brulee..."
Cal has issues. Instead of arguing with Emily, who's just informed him she's been unfaithful, what does he do? He jumps from a moving car!
Jacob: "The war between the sexes is over. We won the second women started doing pole dancing for exercise."
Jacob is a stone cold player, and he's teaching Cal as best he can, acting as his "wing man" and trying to get him out into the dating world (successfully).
Cal: "God can you put on some clothes please?"
Jacob: "Oh, I'm sorry is this bothering you?"
Cal: "No, it's not!"
Jacob: "Cal, if it's not bothering you then we've got a bigger problem."