Many wedding planning books provide a very detailed list of who should pay for what and when. Times have changed since the late 90s and payment issues have become more flexible. However, some expenses are still well defined. It is still a given that the bride will pay for her own wedding gown, her groom's wedding ring and gift as well as her own personal hair and skin care expenses.

Although the bridal party and attendants have traditionally been liable for their own wedding attire and travel expenses, there is no hard and fast rule for 2002.

One new bridal planning challenge is making decisions about bridal party hair, make-up and other expenses. Is each attendant required to pay for having their hair done for the wedding? What is appropriate when the bride requests that all the members of her party wear their hair in a special bridal theme style?

While it may be appropriate for a bridal attendant to pay for headgear to match her wedding gear, is it appropriate to be required to pay for a special updo or a pre-wedding spa trip? Bridal Hair Themes

Any bride's thoughts regarding a central hair or makeup theme needs to be discussed at the very beginning of the wedding planning stage. Consideration and communication with the bridal party about hair and make-up issues are critical in deciding who should foot the bill for what services.

This topic may also be the financial dividing point for attendants that are unable to invest unlimited funds to be part of the wedding party. If you really dream of everyone with twisted updo tresses, it is important that you say so at the beginning so your attendants have a clear picture of what is required of them both financially and otherwise.

Some bridal consultants suggest that a central hair theme is appropriate for a formal day or evening wedding, but less important for an informal or casual wedding. Since it is more likely that a formal wedding will require a formal, floor length bridal attendant gown with matching headwear, co-ordinated hair styles would probably be very reasonable.

Who Pays For Attendant Hair?

Many brides opt for having a stylist come to their home and do their hair for the wedding. This is usually after one or two hair styling rehearsals so that all the loose ends have been dealt with.

If a central hair theme has been agreed upon in advance by everyone in the bridal or wedding party, the payment issue should also be settled long before the date of the wedding.

When a central hair style like a French braid, twist or similar updo is requested, opinions are split regarding payment responsibility. One wedding consultant suggested that the bride pay for one pre-wedding styling rehearsal as well as for the wedding day styling.

Another consultant suggested that in lieu of required attendant headgear, the bride may inquire if her bridal party members would be willing to pay for all or a portion of their hair styling services. Some of her attendants may not balk at being requested to wear their hair in a specific style but may resent paying for it to boot. Bridal Luncheon At The Spa

Since the trend is for many bridal parties to visit a day spa together for pre-wedding pampering, luncheons or showers, why not schedule your attendant luncheon at the spa? Throw in a hairstyling for each member of the party as part of your special paid gift. This allows the attendant to have a pre-wedding styling rehearsal, relax at the spa and enjoy your luncheon at the same time.

If you are planning for a stylist to come to your home and do your wedding hair, inquire about having a second stylist accompany them. The two stylists can probably manage to handle the hair for the entire bridal party. In this scenario the bride or her family should pick up the hair styling tab and any tips.

Keep in mind that having two stylists at your home for any length of time will be more expensive than if you all went to the salon. However, there are many advantages that outweigh the disadvantages and the potential cost.